USB

USB

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Where would we be without this gizmo so cute?
Vital for all with a need to compute
So many devices it helps to connect
The flow of our data by its use we direct

Over the years these gadgets evolved
Internal architectural problems resolved
Using both parallel and serial connections
The messages moved in every direction

The transfer of data between computer components
Is the task of the ‘bus’ from moment to moment
Thus hardware and software it seeks to unite
And moves all the data at the speed of light

Apart from aiding so much data traffic
USB’s have features that seem almost magic
As storage devices they can hold a huge stash
In the memory systems which they now call ‘flash’

So endless word documents and complex spreadsheets
Dictionaries and maps showing all the known streets
And our photos and music they can thus secrete
All safely stored and labeled so neat

If you wish to display your work on PowerPoint
Your presentation you can proudly anoint
With considerable glamour all packed in a stick
The audience dazzled by your display so slick

So let’s give a cheer for this great innovation
Portable media released to the nation
Within the tiny shell of the USB case
So much raw power that we can embrace

Ken Fisher

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Maps

Maps

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Maps, our bird’s eye view of the world
Miraculously we soar on high drone-like
O’er the expansive land and sea
Towns and countryside in microcosm

Maps compiled for different purposes
Physical maps to show the hills and valleys
Rivers and lakes, forests and fields
Contour lines trace shape and elevation

Maps political claiming who owns what
The boundaries of the nations
The states therein and cities all identified
Motorways, roads, canals and railways

Maps economic show the sites
Of natural resources, farmland and mines
Factories, mills and fisheries
So much of manufacturing now museum pieces

Maps that let us dive below the surface
Sensing the contours of the ocean floor
Vast trenches and ridges there detected
The conflict of tectonic plates

Maps that are more like diagrams
Zoomed in we confront the details
The London Tube, the airlines’
Skyways to sunshine on exotic shores

Maps of larger scale to take us under streets
Channels and tunnels for our utilities
Power and gas, water and sewerage
And fibre optics for the internet and phones

Maps are not just tied to location
They are also a snapshot in time. There and then
Thus maps can unite geography with history
Depicting the past in time and place

So give thanks for Maps and the work of all cartographers
From the pioneers of the Ordnance Survey
To those who deploy todays drones and satellites
From canvas sheets to GPS the world laid bare

Ken Fisher

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Atlas

Power Cut

Power Cut

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Today, for a brief interval, we experienced an unusual event
There was a power cut – or outage as they call it in the US
I say unusual because it seems to happen very rarely
And I thought it must simply have been a bulb
That had burned out and blown our fuses
But no, the fuses all seemed undisturbed

And so it dawned on us that our vital energy supply
Had suddenly been removed. The spark extinguished
And all at once a number of unfamiliar beeps pulsated
From devices unused to service interruption
Little red lights flashed, and LCD displays closed their eyes
Even the Smart Meter discovered it was not quite smart enough

And then one starts to wonder if other aspects of our virtual life
Have been threatened by the removal of the magic flow of electrons
What if our planned recordings on the Tivo box are sabotaged?
What about those anxiously awaited emails. The calendar
perhaps set into disarray. The reminder messages forgotten?
More important – what about tonight’s cryogenic chicken in the freezer!

Of course all of this is simply emblematic of our dependency
Without the power we have rendered ourselves powerless
No communications, no heat and light, no monitoring or control
Much of our supply of news and entertainment gone AWAL
And unless you have your home generator, how will you manage
From your nonexistent stash of batteries and candles?

Still, in days of yore humankind survived somehow
Perhaps we have all become too reliant
We cannot believe that the rupture of these vital lines
The exhaustion of non-renewable resources
Or just a simple technical glitch can thus render us hopeless
Thank goodness the power returned in ten minutes
Perhaps it was all just a brief nightmare!

Ken Fisher

Curmudgeon

Curmudgeon

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Sometimes we should briefly pause
And ask ourselves what is the cause
Of our behaviour so carnaptious
Childlike and quite often fractious

Perhaps it’s a rheumatic twinge
Or the result of some eating binge
When sometimes we feel out of sorts
Gloomy face, and temper short

Maybe a symptom of old age
Is that the reason why we rage?
At little gripes that bring dismay
That shouldn’t happen every day!

Sometimes we echo John Paul Sartre
Philosopher so very smart
He claimed ‘hell is other people’
Among them we ne’er can be gleeful

And for our temper we always find excuse
Too often we seem to feel the blues
But if a cure we hope to find
To others we need to be kind

And if we live life with a smile
Make acceptance our new style
The curmudgeon will soon fade away
As joy to others we display

Ken Fisher

Dietary Control

Dietary Control

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Recently I had to review my diet
Eat anything but just don’t fry it!
Thus the experts would advise
Caw canny on the old French fries

Perhaps I just exaggerate
Should watch what we put on our plate
No processed food laden with fat
We should remember old Jack Sprat

In an Italian diet we can rejoice
They know what is the healthy choice
Pasta seems to do much good
A dietician’s favoured food

Of great salad meals we can be proud
Veg and fruit we must espouse
Submerge yourself in oily fish
Definitely the favoured dish

Say good-bye to oven chips
Chunky steaks must now eclipse
Subsumed by beans and other pulses
Learn to control our salty urges

Apparently we need some starchy foods
Bread and rice can do much good
Potatoes baked with their skins on
Might help promote both brain and brawn

For breakfast don’t ignore your porridge
And of cereals ensure no shortage
Dairy products, milk, cheese and yoghurt
If low-fat will never hurt

Perhaps this is too scientific
Deluged with facts, far too prolific
Energy, protein, and saturates
How do I get them to my plate?

However expert advice is for the best
And while we must not be obsessed
Following their balanced plan –
More salad bowl, less frying pan!

Ken Fisher

 

Fake News

Fake News

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Fake News seems to be the latest threat
A thing truth-lovers much regret
What once purports to be good news
May credibility abuse

And bad news may be hidden in disguise
And simply be a bunch of lies
So how fact from fiction we discern
Is now-a-days of great concern

When what we’re told can’t be believed
And all the time we’re being deceived
What’s the point of news that’s fake
The clear view ahead becomes opaque

So let’s resolve truth to restore
And fake news duly to deplore
And in our press and on our lips
Honest words and faithful scripts

Ken Fisher

Signature

Signature

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Watching ‘The Donald’ make his mark on documents official
Adding his signature to edicts advisory or judicial
Reminds me of the importance of when I sign on the line
I confirm that what is written is then truly mine

Perhaps within our land the signature most notable
Is that of Elizabeth our sovereign so admirable
Thus Acts of Parliament duly come into force
When Her Majesty assents and does them formally endorse

But the word signature has other applications
And is used in many differing situations
Thus TV and Radio shows are sure to emphasise
Their arrival with a tune that we all recognize

And if to watch the Bake Off was your fondest wish
Observing competitors concoct their signature dish
And of course if we wish to use a cheque to pay a bill
We sign our name confirming payment’s our own will

And the legal world still needs us to sign our name
On contracts and wills or an insurance claim
And if it’s your intention your promises to pledge
In marriage or mortgage, signing you simply cannot hedge!

Now that handwriting seems just about extinct
How do we prove we are unique and distinct?
Perhaps only by signing our personal name
Our identity to the world we still seek to make plain

On reflection it seems some hand-writing is so poor
And especially the signature which looks totally obscure
To me it’s not surprising the smart card’s usurped the pen
And perhaps those cryptic scribbles won’t e’er be seen again

Ken Fisher

 

The Swiss Army Knife

The Swiss Army Knife

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[Verses in praise of this multi-purpose tool]

 

The Swiss Army Knife is quite cutting edge
No limit to the uses to which it can stretch
Such a wide variety of functional tools
It might be described a cask full of jewels

The makers have offered several sizes
Tiny versions to huge ones brim full of surprises
There are blades just for cutting a string or a thread
And others could produce the proverbial sliced bread

There are hooks for extracting stones from a shoe
Sawblades for slicing through wood or bamboo
Pliers for those who aspire to try dentistry
And scissors for some who would prefer surgery

Gadgets for opening bottles so tight
Driving in screws made an effort so light
Indeed no matter the task, or whatever the trade
The Swiss Army Knife has a suitable blade

One point to note, which can be a snag
At airport check-ins hide it inside your bag
As the authorities might feel you have evil intent
To carrying a knife they give no assent

However, despite any such petty restrictions
Don’t spurn this tool and its applications
Because you never know what pops up in this life
And you are better prepared with a Swiss Army Knife!

Ken Fisher

[This poem is published with the prior permission of
Victorinox, manufacturers of the Swiss Army Knife]

Danger – Chilly Water

Danger – Chilly Water

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I went for a swim in the public baths
I thought it might do me good
But the water felt like an icy blast
And my swearing was quite rude

Nobody warned me of the shock I would get
As I plunged straight into the water
It was an experience that I cannot forget
In future I’ll wait till it’s hotter

So if by an urge you are suddenly seized
To leap into some lido or pool
By this temptation do not be deceived
Or you may seethe while trying to be ‘cool’

Ken Fisher

Hoping for the Best

Hoping for the Best

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There is little that can be added to what’s been said already
All that we can hope for is that the ship of state keeps steady
‘The Donald’ will be the President number forty-five
Let’s pray that our hopes for world peace still remain alive

After all, he has proved in the past he can run great enterprises
So perhaps all the vicissitudes of government will bring no surprises
Of course at governance he may still be an apprentice
If he told himself “you’re fired” that would be momentous

However, it seems that from today’s grand inauguration
He becomes the most powerful man in that mighty nation
And throughout the world his influence will travel far and wide
May humility and wisdom yet in his heart abide

Ken Fisher

 

Moon

Moon

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Moon
mysterious sphere
whose face remains inscrutable
your phases measuring each month
whose light a pale reflection of the sun
shines on us like a slowly turning beacon
on frosty nights your face is bright and clear
but cloud and rain obscure your steady glow
your gnarled face mottled like an ageing man
craters and dry seas form your rugged features
no wonder, your age near that of ancient parent
child formed by debris of your mother earth
but distance has not dimmed your power
to influence our life here on the earth
the tides from time immemorial
by gravity’s mighty force
mover of oceans
Moon

 

The Earth of Which we Tread

The Earth on Which we Tread

(Written in 2010)

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Having spent quite some years on the study of space
    under the guidance of all-knowing D A C E,*
I decided this year to reduce my ambition
    the close study of Earth is my new mission

Planet three, out of nine*, strung out from the Sun
    geologists make sure that it’s their number One,
Tucked neatly away between Venus and Mars,           
    for them Earth’s as great as all the bright stars

Geologists aver in their theories heretical,
    that “built in seven days” is really quite fanciful
Four point six billion years – perhaps even longer,     
    they claim that was needed to bring chaos to order.

The history of time is a remarkable thing,
    stretching right back like in a limitless string
Earth formed its core, its mantle, then crust,
    that’s the top layer in which we must trust

The picture we have of our planet today           
    resulted as forces had their sway
Volcanoes, earthquakes, even plate tectonics
    produced effects which became rather chronic

Rocks seem to move in a kind of a cycle,
    pushed up to the top like the cream on a trifle
Then they crumble and fall, get all twisted and bent,
    and sink down below to form deep sediment


  Igneous rocks are derived from the lava

  Metamorphics, from some squeezing palaver
Sedimentary rocks, on the other hand,
    at least give us chalk, mudstone, and sand

Geological time has titles heroic,
    Precambrian, Palaeozoic, Mesozoic, and Cainozoic
Mastery of these can not be avoided,
    and furthermore, each is then sub-divided

Palaeozoic divides at least into six,
    Each time-scale gets learners into a fix
Permian and Silurian present no clear goal,    
    at least Carboniferous gave us King Coal

Mesozoic and Cainozoic span many millions of years,
    for inquiring students they present little fears
Dinosaurs popped up (and down) within the Jurassic,
perhaps had their debut in ancient Triassic

Geologists claim that the continents drift,
    one of their statements leaves us quite miffed
Our weather will never be better later,
    now that Ayr no longer strides the equator

Fossil records help throw light on our dark,
    some of these beauties are in Victoria Park!
Many solid rocks were once quite organic,     
    they’ve been long dead – so no need to panic!

The earth below has many treasures,
    discovering these holds untold pleasures
Coal, oil, and gas yield mighty power,
    from ages past a generous dower

Minerals are found in every hue,
    Emerald green to Sapphire blue
Diamonds command a heavy spend,    
    but are they still “a girl’s best friend”?

Gemstones’ names are shrouded in mystery,  
    much of it in long past history,
Chemistry too, sheds some light,
    thus yielding quarts, gypsum and calcite

After rocks were formed, then vegetation,
    creatures had some habitation
Through these primeval early traumas,
    evolved the lower palaeozoic faunas

Then given time – in endless ages,
    primitive creatures joined history’s pages
Mammals very late in all this plan,
    not two million years – the story of man

Our late appearance is a fact,
    but humans make a huge impact
In search for food and habitation
    Mother Earth has felt our exploitation

We need to live, we need to strive,
    any less and we would not be alive
Geologists’ concern for conservation
    shows it’s vital to our preservation

So when on heath and earth we bound
    Spare just a thought about the ground
On which we tread and take our leisure
    Beneath our feet, world without measure

Ken Fisher

 

* DACE = Dept of Adult & Continuing Education, Glasgow University

  • Now only 8 Planets since Pluto was demoted!