Author Archives: thebardofkelvindale.com

The Cumbernauld Clock

The Cumbernauld Clock

I remember well this iconic clock
When strolling past on a lunch-time walk
In the centre of town in Cumbernauld
Whose architecture some critics appalled

I was teaching there in the shiny new college
Hoping to increase the residents’ knowledge
At that time the clock became the locus
On which much attention would then focus

Gregory’s Girl provided worldwide renown
And in Jubilee Year the Queen came to town
The clock features in both these events
As of course did many proud residents

Cumbernauld in the beginning tried to ensure
That pedestrains from traffic were kept quite secure
Converging paths from suburbs approached the top
To then pay homage to that venerable clock

Now the clock is the subject of a tug of war
Twixt the townies and others who would it restore
And move it away to a quite different location
To keep time in newly renovated Queen Street Station

So whatever the fate of this worthy time piece
Of horology no doubt a great masterpiece
I hope it will continue to tick quietly away
As it measures the passing of each welcome new day

Ken Fisher

The Promise of Spring 2019

The Promise of Spring 2019


[for the vernal equinox]
 
Is it too good to be believed?
Windows still recovering from March gales
When hailstones stung our cheeks
Dark clouds shrouded the lowering sky
New shoots fighting for life
Ground yet sodden by endless rain
At last a brighter dawn emerges
For today is the equinox
A twice-yearly event
When night and day are of equal length
The day when the sun’s centre
Passes through the equator
The promise of more light and warmth
But above all this it is
‘The First Day of Spring’
Creatures stir from hibernation
The rebirth of flora and fauna
Perhaps new hope arises
In our weary souls

KEN FISHER

 

Scunnered

Scunnered

Scunnered with Brexit
Why can’t they fixit?
Scunnered with the News
It just gives me the blues
Scunnered with food
That may do me no good
Scunnered with pundits
Who expect all our plaudits
Scunnered with tradesmen
Who defect when I need them
Scunnered when buses fail to show up
Then three arrive, only one can pick up
Scunnered with prices that keep on rising
Especially for things I find appetizing
And so it goes on, scunners without any end
Surely there is something I can still recommend!

Ken Fisher

 

Happy 60th Birthday Barbie

Happy 60th Birthday Barbie

Barbie might now earn a pension
Although that she may not want to mention
For today’s the day to celebrate
At 60 she’s still looking great

Her boyfriend Ken is not so old
Much less glamour to behold
But Barbie’s fame stretches worldwide
Plaudits come from every side

Throughout the years she has evolved
To hold the limelight she resolved
Come change of fashion or of taste
No opportunity did she waste

Following trends where ‘ere they led
Barbie’s fame became widespread
Responding to the social mores
Her style part of the nation’s story

In dress Barbie sought to respect
A world not devoid of flaw or defect
Equal choices for the sexes
In working clothes were soon reflected

Barbie dolls have weathered every storm
Aware of what now is the norm
Through every challenge secured survival
Gaining success over every rival

So congratulations Barbie on this your day
Sixty years no one can gainsay
You’ve become a national treasure
In that success we all take pleasure

Ken Fisher

Anything Can Happen and Probably Will

Anything Can Happen and Probably Will

search-1

Some say that life is full of surprises
Surely that is one of its greatest blessings
Where would we be if every day was predictable
And the element of surprise completely absent?

A heritage radio programme – Take it From Here
Used the catch phrase – anything can happen and ……..
The comedy show then showcased lots of skits
Where the unexpected added spice to the scripts

Mind you, there are those who would prefer a life
Where surprise was kept to a minimum
Perhaps they have lived through too much uncertainty
Their smooth passage interrupted by many incidents

Recently we moved house and are settling in
To our new home.  Quite a stressful transition
We had planned it quite well, but did not escape
Unpredicted collateral damage!

Often the best way of coping with the unexpected
Is to be prepared in advance for eventualities
Then when something springs up it is less of a trial
More an unexpected pleasure, something of serendipity

Sometimes we can deliberately seek out excitement
By exposing ourselves to the unknown, even the dangerous
From a simple mystery tour to a trek into the wilderness
From tourist to pilgrim, to nomad or adventurer

So why don’t we attune our minds to the possibility
That in life anything can happen and probably will
Because things do happen, no matter what
And our reaction may bring us grief or joy

Ken Fisher

 

 

Plan B

Plan B

Sometimes it is wise to prepare a Plan B
If plan A should fail I am sure you’ll agree
Common sense demands we give consideration
If what we intended might end in frustration

In commerce and trade Plan B is worthwhile
If bold risk-taking is not the appropriate style
Caution is needed if firms want to stay liquid
Ensuring their losses are tightly restricted

It is all very well to boldly go forth
Believing Plan A has infinite worth
But when in time expectations flounder
Having no Plan B is surely a blunder

In politics too Plan B is essential
Although MPs believe in the life providential
Declaring success whatever arises
Denying changed plans cause them surprises

And so in life when things diverge from our plan
An alternative course we should take if we can
Plan A,  no doubt in its day a sensible course
But if needed, use plan B, and have no remorse

Ken Fisher

Timor Mortis Conturbat Me

Timor Mortis Conturbat Me
[Fear of Death Disturbs Me]

 

In days of yore when pupils at school were ruled with iron rod
When few would dare to question the reality of God
What might confront us when moved beyond the grave
Rarely could be swept aside, even by the brave

Fear of death was a powerful motivating force
Lest we find that by past deeds we are thereafter cursed
Reflecting on the hereafter would thus our souls perturb
Resolving that our conduct might ne’er God’s rule usurp

Today our mindset has cast aside that shadow
Death’s menace ignored with much bold bravado
Indeed death now rarely accorded even mention
Eternal life apparently the focus of attention

And yet we know that such a view is unrealistic
Life may be longer but still remains naturalistic
Indeed today perhaps our fear is not of death but living
Amidst the challenges of modern life which can be unforgiving

So what might be the Holy Grail, the nostrum for our age?
To help us navigate a course and all our angst assuage
That neither fear of death nor life might carry off our peace
And from all that would disturb we might duly find release

Ken Fisher

Poetry on a Plate

Poetry on a Plate 

[A poem for Burns Night]

A sight to make your eyes dilate
No less than poetry on a plate
Haggis and neeps to bring delight
Who can resist this tasty bite?

And on this day when we recall
Scotland’s greatest poet of them all
Let’s relish in this ancient dish
What greater pleasure could one wish?

As we savour this grand repast
Reflecting on verses from the past
We rejoice in the gift of crafted word
And joy which food on us conferred

Ken Fisher

How Do You Do?

How Do You Do?

[An odd little poem]

 

How Do You Do?
I am quite well, thank you

 
How, may I ask, are you?
All the better for seeing you

 
Oh, you really are too kind
What are you planning for today?

 
I truly have nothing in my mind
Why not just take a little walk?

 
Yes that’s what I think I might do
Might I accompany you on your walk?

 
I see no reason why not
And then together we can talk

Thus we will while the time away
Yes that’s how we both might spend the day

 
This conversation is a game of ping pong
I serve a sentence over to you

 Then you bat back an immediate response
But we must keep the ball in play

 
Until one of us has no more to say
And then it becomes a fair bet

That the chit-chat will die as words get caught in the net
I wonder what will happen if I say no more

 
And I similarly wonder that too
Will the challenge of silence be too much for us both?

 
Then again each may ask How Do You Do?

 

 

Ken Fisher

 

 

 

 

Removal Upheaval

Removal Upheaval

 

I don’t know how often you have changed your address
But for the inexperienced this seems to cause great distress
And although we look forward with keen anticipation
We advance to our move date with some real trepidation

At first there’s the trauma of the purchase and sale
Which can push your blood pressure right off the scale
Having found your new home after diligent search
You hope you aren’t out-bid and left in the lurch

And once your target property is safely secured
Will the price leave you among the indigent poor?
Then panic sets in as you now need to sell up
Caught in the pincers that could leave you bankrupt

Of course there are professionals to help steer you through
Estate agents and lawyers, and mortgage brokers too
They are all case-hardened by years of experience
And promise their efforts will make such a difference

In the fullness of time the dark clouds will lift
And earlier worries can at last be dismissed
Your old home sold off and a new one acquired
Surely your clever dealings will be duly admired

But now you are faced with an onerous chore
Of clearing your old home from ceiling to floor
Then moving all your chattels to their new habitation
You must get on quickly with no procrastination

There is no doubt that we cannot avoid this disruption
When all our normal routines suffer vast interruption
It affects our body and mind and no doubt our purse
Perhaps selling agents should provide us all with a nurse

However, in the end when in our new flat we have settled down
Perhaps we can smile and dispense with that frown
The removal upheaval no longer an obsession
And in our new home we find pride of possession

Ken Fisher

Brexit (Decision Time)

Brexit (Decision Time)

Perhaps we should ban the word Brexit
Tell it to head for the exit
For months on end we have discussed it
Everyone of us now quite disgusted!

You expect more of our politicians
Who perform smarter tricks than magicians
Surely they have had time enough to resolve
Manifold problems they had to solve

But we remain in great disarray
Observing with mounting dismay
Internal strife now quite a spectacle
As we marvel at this chaotic debacle

At the referendum the nation gave a decision
But on facts quite devoid of precision
Since then many months have elapsed
Yet we are feeling increasingly trapped

MPs in civil war are engaged
As voices become more enraged
And the public watches on quite aghast
As each other with rhetoric they lambast

The time has come to make up their mind
And without seeming to be unkind
The various factions must learn to concede
That in or out our great UK should succeed

It seems the mood of the nation
Is we have had enough prevarication
Our legislators might get a firm grip
Abandon the pointless brinkmanship

Doubtless this island people will survive
And next week we will still be alive
So let’s make up our minds, fix on one choice
And in either deal or no deal let’s rejoice

Ken Fisher

Poetry at Work Day 2019

Poetry at Work

Can daily work reveal something poetic
Or is this simply empty rhetoric?
Work needed so that we can earn our corn
Not the object of  lyrical concern

Yet there are some who find poetry everywhere
The common round, the daily toil, what’er
The humble duty, the routine task
Thoughtful language can readily unmask

So on this day when poetry we celebrate
At the water cooler let’s initiate debate
On the poetry we can discover in our work
As CEO,  professional or lowly clerk

And let us all determine to take a little time
To sample poetry’s  gifts mundane or sumblime
That not just on this commemorative day
The poet’s art might illuminate our way

Ken Fisher